Love is often the starting point for realizing many of our greatest dreams. When we find ourselves in an internal conflict, our dreams are threatened. However, all relationships have conflicts. It is through these conflicts that we have the opportunity to grow. Our way of handling conflicts is crucial for our companionship and quality of life. Often, we interpret our partner’s wishes and intentions without asking. Arguments about who is right are hopeless. It is important to listen to what the other person is saying and inquire about the other party’s experience of the situation. Your experience does not become wrong by doing so. Only when we accept each other’s different experiences can we meet. If unsuccessful, over time, you may lose either yourself or each other. Couples therapy, with Valby parterapi, can help if you find yourselves stuck.
Attachment Patterns
Our attachment patterns follow us throughout life and strongly influence how we relate to other people, especially how we relate to our partner:
- Do you want to rediscover intimacy with each other?
- Do you want to improve the way you handle conflict?
- Do you want to become stronger together?
- Do you want to learn to be more honest and independent in your relationship?
- Do you want to understand your partner better?
- Do you want to change the ills in your relationship?
- Do you want to better express your inner world to your partner?
- Do you argue over who is wrong?
- Do you often misunderstand each other?
- Would you rather leave yourself than your partner?
- Do you feel more like siblings or best friends than lovers?
- Have you experienced many or severe traumas together?
- Do you feel like second fiddle in your relationship?
- Do you try to get things from your partner that you didn’t get as a child?
- Do you feel dependent on your partner in some way to feel noticed and loved?
- Are you considering divorce?
In couples therapy, the main goal of couples therapy is to make both of you feel seen and welcome. You can get to know yourselves and each other more clearly. Therefore, we will talk about the feelings that keep you apart from each other and the feelings that bring you together. If you can’t get your partner to come to couples therapy, there is an opportunity for you to come to therapy on your own. Because your relationship is all about you – start there. When one person in the relationship changes, the other can’t continue to stay the same. Dynamic Change: Getting to Know Your Relationship Better